Inner Voice

The late John Pontius said that people generally hear three different inner voices: your own, the Holy Ghost, and the Adversary. This is about "your own".

I was thinking about the commandment to love your neighbor as yourself, and it occurred to me that an implication of that is that you need to love yourself, too, and treat yourself at least as kindly as you would a complete stranger.

I would never go up to a stranger on the street and growl and complain and criticize him. I'd be kind and polite. Minnesota nice is the bare minimum.

But it occurred to me that I am not always this kind to myself, and I was saying this to myself in my not-so-nice voice. I then thought, "if I were saying this to a stranger, that is NOT the tone of voice I'd use. Try again."

So I tried saying it as though it were to a person who I was trying to be polite to. It was the same words, but the tone of my voice was softer, warmer, more patient, and about half an octave higher, lacking the original stern gruffness of criticism. It was more... just informational... with no implied criticism of the person I was speaking to. Like I was trying to help correct an innocent error, rather than to shame and punish a wrongdoer.

I find I like it better when my inner voice is nicer to me. It'll take practice, but I think it's a direction I want to go.

Eventually I hope to ramp it up to habitually speaking to myself in the same tones I use in speaking to people I actively love and respect.

UPDATE: Another way to warm things up: start sentences with "hmmm..." and a pause to consider. Very gentle and inoffensive.

Huh... never thought of trying not to offend myself before...

UPDATE (4-6-20): I need to make my voice sound more like His voice.

Hmmmm... we are often told the goal should be to become more like Christ. Maybe His voice, in addition to his actions, is a good place to start. I don't think I've ever heard anyone advocate for this approach, though.

UPDATE: Light Googling confirms: people tend to only think of hearing Christ's voice in terms of the actions he tells you to take. One site talked about word choice, saying "we sound like Jesus when our words echo those of the gospel and when our deeds match with what we say."

There's just no discussion of tone. The closest that gets is "still" and "small".

UPDATE: OK, better Googling ("the tone of Christ's voice") gets a little play, but it only talks about what tone you use when you read his words in the scriptures.

UPDATE (4-13-20): Satan often disguises his voice to sound like mine. I can tell them apart, but I have to be paying attention.